Let’s look at the ways that homophobia has existed in our society. Homophobia is often conflated with heterosexism and transphobia. There are some important differences between these prejudices. Our attitudes and understanding around LGBTQIA+ identities have continued to change over the years, especially as science has studied the genetics behind LGBTQIA+ identities. Q Chat Space hosts live chats where LGBTQ+ teens can give and receive support.

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Not gonna lie, it almost broke us up too, and there’s huge drama the once or so a year we try to plan a visit to see her mom. We live a long way away from her, it’s the only way to make it work. This youth had no place to go so in a way he was a hostage. In hostage situations, people have to go into survival mode and do what it takes to stay safe–until they can get away. However, the hostage needs to always understand that being a hostage is not their fault and they need to find ways to maintain their self-esteem during the process . I advised him that it was ok to go back into the closet and stay there until he was old enough to leave home safely, and/or his parents had a change of opinion.

The problem lies deep within our societal assumptions. Consider the situation facing LGBTQ persons when they are exposed throughout their life to the only cultural templates considered acceptable—hetero or cisgender relationships. If points 1), 2), or 3) or the hostage situation applies to you, then it is ok to stay IN the closet temporarily until you are mature and independent enough to support yourself financially or emotionally. See videos at for encouragement from celebrities as well as LGBT adults who were in your shoes at one time.

Handling Homophobic Reactions & Harassment

Both gay and straight people can be transphobic and biphobic, and people can be transphobic without being homophobic or biphobic. People who identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual may experience harassment or discrimination from people who are scared of or uncomfortable with these identities. “A lot of gay men came out as bisexual themselves in order to come to terms with their sexuality, but they fail to realise that whilst for some people bisexuality is a stepping stone, for others it’s a destination.

They are super nice to me but still don’t acknowledge me as anything other than a friend. It doesn’t mean those things don’t hurt and aren’t worthy of grief but trying to get approval from someone who just won’t give it to you is going to drive you mad and just hurt like hell. I want to thank Kayla and all the rest of you for spending https://hookupgenius.com/ a little time on my own concerns. If you need someone to talk to, there are many hotlines available to help LGBTIQ+ youth who have been rejected by their families. They are also more likely to engage in survival sex work in order to have a place to stay and food to eat. This puts them at risk for violence, disease, and exploitation.

Internalized homophobia can also influence things like the careers a person chooses, the people they choose to date, and what their romantic and sexual life looks like. This messaging, which is both explicit and implicit, can be incredibly damaging to queer people. It often leads to something called internalized homophobia. Finding a safe place to speak about your feelings is of paramount importance. Whether you confide in a supportive family member, a friend or a therapist, having an outlet for your feelings is vital. Facing prejudice from your family can negatively affect your self-esteem and even cause depression.

Gauge their response to the conversation—while some might be openly homophobic, others simply might not know or understand what it’s like to be an LGBTQ individual. You can use their reactions to decide whether or not coming out is a good idea or not. There’s no easy way to deal with or process homophobia, especially when it comes from a close relative. Instead, ask your family member why they feel the way that they do, and why they insist on making homophobic remarks.

All those responses are screaming, “Fix this bad feeling for me! Challenge your colleagues’ homophobic behaviour and attitudes. Don’t participate in inappropriate joking or conversation. Speak up about your views on accepting others regardless of their sexual preferences. Don’t accept stereotypical characterizations and beliefs about homosexual or bisexual people.

You aren’t responsible for trying to correct or change a person with homophobic beliefs, especially if you feel like the situation could become heated. If your family members are more open-minded, it might help to remind them that homophobia is any kind of prejudice against gay members of the LGBTQ community. Explain how homophobia can be spread through casual language, as well as obvious slurs. Additionally, mention how homophobic attitudes can lead to hate crimes, where LGBTQ individuals are the targets of violent crimes.

Honestly for certain cultures love isn’t even involved but Parents being wiser ? What about this Planet makes you believe anyone’s parents were wiser? If they are homophobic more than likely they are with someone they don’t love. My gf seems to think she can wear them down – she would never not invite me to family events or accept it if they were outright nasty to me. But I don’t think they’ll ever change , and it will definitely come to a head if/when we have kids.

But according to Tanner, it’s common for people experiencing internalized homophobia to experience depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, and a variety of other mental health conditions. For some family members, homophobia or transphobia are seated in a lack of education. Some people will not ever have known a gay, lesbian or transgender person (or at least they may not have been aware of someone’s identity), and this may have led to fear or misunderstanding. As a gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning person, it can be very difficult to cope with family members who reject who you are. Sadly, homophobia and transphobia can threaten even the strongest of family bonds. I’m a half Brazilian sixteen year old cis lesbian who’s living out in the boonies of Alaska.